I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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