I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Randomize
