I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
