But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
The best revenge is premature balding
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
