using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
babies were throwing up all over the place
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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