I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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