we're blogging at a bar
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
My liver is preforming stress tests.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize