why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
