He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
