And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
