Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
