Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Its about making memories worth repressing
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
home. puking in laundry basket.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
