I just made out with a guy for $7.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
