Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
