My hand turned me down
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I just googled if crying burns calories
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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