So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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