Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
