I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
