shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
