oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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