I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize