I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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