It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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