I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Randomize
