All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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