Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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