Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
