I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
