i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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