2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
we're so committed to being not committed
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
