We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
