Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
She told me I should be a condom model.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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