Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize