there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
