Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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