question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
