before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize