It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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