Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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