If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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