She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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