We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
