Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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