Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
