so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
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