It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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