No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Randomize
