I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize