How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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