ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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