Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Life is so much better after having sex.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
